Thursday, May 24, 2007
GABRIELA-wannabe
Maraming perverts sa mundo. Nagpaparamdam sila kapag may mga taong mukhang weakling at hindi sila makukuhang basagan ng bote sa ulo kapag nagpakitang-gilas sila ng kanilang very disturbing special talent. Hindi ko rin alam kung pano nila nade-determine ang mga pwede nilang maging biktima. Basta for one, hindi ka dapat maglalasing kasama ang strangers, or not so really close friends. Other than that very wise advise, wala na kong idea kung ano pang deciding factors nila.
Ilang beses na rin na-feature sa TV, nasulat sa magazines, at napag-usapan over family dinner kung pano mo po-protektahan ang sarili mo against those spawns of the devils. General Rule: DO NOT ACT SCARED. In fact, ang pinakamagandang dapat mong gawin ay ipahiya sila. SCREAM. Call them names very loudly. Make sure that everyone inside the jeep/bus/fx will know what’s happening, know what he’s doing.
When my officemate encountered one exhibitionist while she was riding a jeepney, she got so scared she got off the nearest stop. Sabi ko, “Hay naku, hindi titigil yan mga yan. Dapat daw sa mga gaya nyan eh pinapahiya! You shouldn’t have acted scared. You should have been very mad and disgusted.” See? I perfectly know how to deal with those perverts from hell, because I was not scared.
Last night, I left the office at 8ish in the evening. The usual route: long, lousy walk to MRT, got off Shaw Station, walk towards Edsa Central FX terminal. Lucky for me because there was no queue. I easily got a seat, sa gitna ng FX. There was mag-jowawers at my left side. Then a middle-aged man sat at my right, beside the door. Personally, I am OC when it comes to my personal space. Kahit magkatabi tayo sa jeep or bus or fx, I am conscious that no body parts of my seatmates ang dumidikit directly sa arms ko, or sa legs ko. Basta, I always find a way na iharang ang jacket ko, or bag ko or any other materials available. The moment a seatmate is leaning towards me and crossing the boundaries of my personal space, I shift position, move a little, just to make them aware that, hey, "move over or I’ll bite your head off!"
So when this man at my right was pa-simpleng dumidikit yun kamay niya sa legs ko, tinataas ko yun malaking bag ko at binabagsak ko with full force sa kamay niya. Kapag lumilingon siya sakin, tinititigan ko siya nang masama until he looked away. And when he exposed his disgusting you know what and jerk off beside me, I screamed at him with full anger and abhorrence! “YUUCK!!!! WHAT IN THE WORLD IS THAT???!!! PUNYETA, ANG BASTOS NYO!!!” So everyone in the FX looked at him, called him names, cursed him, and the driver dragged his pathetic ass out. We left him in the middle of Floodway stripped off of his dignity. And for that, I am so sure that he will never, ever do it again in his entire lifetime. He will attend a counseling group called, “Exhibitionist Anonymous”, and introduce himself like, “Hello, my name is Elmer. And I am an Exhibitionist.” With shame for himself and for the generations under his name.
Yes, that’s what I did because I was not scared... Noh. Let me correct that. That was what I should have done if I didn't get so damn scared.
I got scared. So scared na nanginginig ako when I realized what he was doing. I pretended I didn’t know. But he was making every effort to force me to look. He was moving his hands at dumidikit talaga sa braso ko. PUTANG INA. My mind and common sense left me so shocked I was not moving at all. I felt like screaming everytime he looks at me directly. I was scared, mad, disgusted, and really, really, really damn scared. For a moment I thought I was not breathing. Am I dead? At that time, oh shit, I wish I were. That was the longest fx ride of my life. When he finally decided that he has done me enough torture to last a lifetime, he paid for his fare (Eeew, yuck Manong driver, wag mong abutin yun bayad! Yan yun kamay niyang gamit pang-ano…YUCK!!!!), he immediately got off along Angono Hi-way. After he closed the door, I was just sitting there, sa madilim na fx, tulala -- with the mag-jowawers beside me cuddling like crazy, the mag-kumares sa likod ko chikahan animatedly, the driver talking through his radio, and the rest of the passengers dozing off to dreamland.
When I arrived home, I couldn’t bring myself to talk about it to my Mom who cheerily greeted me at the door. Magwo-worry lang siya lalo sa gabi-gabi kong pag-uwi. She has enough worries now so hindi makakatulong ang masamang impormasyong dala ko. I just locked myself up in the bathroom, splashed cold water to my face, as I cried. If only I wasn’t that weak, and scared and a victim-material, eh di sana nasa Exhibitionist Anonymous na ngayon ang hinayupak na yun.
Moral Lesson:
Wala. Hindi ko na sasabihing "don't act scared". Kasi really, when you're there, the situation isn't going to be in black and white. So I just hope and pray that this will not happen to you. And tonight and for the coming nights, I will also pray that we'd be given enough strength and balls (no pun intended) to fight against every devils* we encounter everyday in our lives.
*devils - manyak, perverts, exhibtionists, magnanakaw, mamatay-tao, rapist, kidnapper, terrorista... you got the point.
Ilang beses na rin na-feature sa TV, nasulat sa magazines, at napag-usapan over family dinner kung pano mo po-protektahan ang sarili mo against those spawns of the devils. General Rule: DO NOT ACT SCARED. In fact, ang pinakamagandang dapat mong gawin ay ipahiya sila. SCREAM. Call them names very loudly. Make sure that everyone inside the jeep/bus/fx will know what’s happening, know what he’s doing.
When my officemate encountered one exhibitionist while she was riding a jeepney, she got so scared she got off the nearest stop. Sabi ko, “Hay naku, hindi titigil yan mga yan. Dapat daw sa mga gaya nyan eh pinapahiya! You shouldn’t have acted scared. You should have been very mad and disgusted.” See? I perfectly know how to deal with those perverts from hell, because I was not scared.
Last night, I left the office at 8ish in the evening. The usual route: long, lousy walk to MRT, got off Shaw Station, walk towards Edsa Central FX terminal. Lucky for me because there was no queue. I easily got a seat, sa gitna ng FX. There was mag-jowawers at my left side. Then a middle-aged man sat at my right, beside the door. Personally, I am OC when it comes to my personal space. Kahit magkatabi tayo sa jeep or bus or fx, I am conscious that no body parts of my seatmates ang dumidikit directly sa arms ko, or sa legs ko. Basta, I always find a way na iharang ang jacket ko, or bag ko or any other materials available. The moment a seatmate is leaning towards me and crossing the boundaries of my personal space, I shift position, move a little, just to make them aware that, hey, "move over or I’ll bite your head off!"
So when this man at my right was pa-simpleng dumidikit yun kamay niya sa legs ko, tinataas ko yun malaking bag ko at binabagsak ko with full force sa kamay niya. Kapag lumilingon siya sakin, tinititigan ko siya nang masama until he looked away. And when he exposed his disgusting you know what and jerk off beside me, I screamed at him with full anger and abhorrence! “
Yes, that’s what I did because I was not scared... Noh. Let me correct that. That was what I should have done if I didn't get so damn scared.
I got scared. So scared na nanginginig ako when I realized what he was doing. I pretended I didn’t know. But he was making every effort to force me to look. He was moving his hands at dumidikit talaga sa braso ko. PUTANG INA. My mind and common sense left me so shocked I was not moving at all. I felt like screaming everytime he looks at me directly. I was scared, mad, disgusted, and really, really, really damn scared. For a moment I thought I was not breathing. Am I dead? At that time, oh shit, I wish I were. That was the longest fx ride of my life. When he finally decided that he has done me enough torture to last a lifetime, he paid for his fare (Eeew, yuck Manong driver, wag mong abutin yun bayad! Yan yun kamay niyang gamit pang-ano…YUCK!!!!), he immediately got off along Angono Hi-way. After he closed the door, I was just sitting there, sa madilim na fx, tulala -- with the mag-jowawers beside me cuddling like crazy, the mag-kumares sa likod ko chikahan animatedly, the driver talking through his radio, and the rest of the passengers dozing off to dreamland.
When I arrived home, I couldn’t bring myself to talk about it to my Mom who cheerily greeted me at the door. Magwo-worry lang siya lalo sa gabi-gabi kong pag-uwi. She has enough worries now so hindi makakatulong ang masamang impormasyong dala ko. I just locked myself up in the bathroom, splashed cold water to my face, as I cried. If only I wasn’t that weak, and scared and a victim-material, eh di sana nasa Exhibitionist Anonymous na ngayon ang hinayupak na yun.
Moral Lesson:
Wala. Hindi ko na sasabihing "don't act scared". Kasi really, when you're there, the situation isn't going to be in black and white. So I just hope and pray that this will not happen to you. And tonight and for the coming nights, I will also pray that we'd be given enough strength and balls (no pun intended) to fight against every devils* we encounter everyday in our lives.
*devils - manyak, perverts, exhibtionists, magnanakaw, mamatay-tao, rapist, kidnapper, terrorista... you got the point.
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