Tuesday, April 24, 2007
Etcetera
Writing
I missed my journal. Kinakailangan ko na atang bumalik sa pagsusulat at iwan ang online blogging. I'm keeping a journal since I was thirteen. When I was too old to ask questions and too young to know the answers. I miss the feeling of just letting the ink of your pen flow freely with your imagination, frustrations, and dreams. I miss the smell of its recycled paper. I miss the nostalgia I experience as I re-read my entiries til I fall asleep. Meron pa ko dun dried petals of roses I got from boyfriend nung hindi pa kami, at nung kami na.. :) Meron din mga marks of dried tears. Most importantly, makikita mo ang changes of emotions just by looking at my handwritings. Meron ako dung mga entries na kapag nababasa ko eh para kong nata-travel back in time. Ganun kalakas ang nostalgic effect niya. I miss Toffie. I think I must revive our good old relationship.
By the way, secret dream ko ang maging isang novelist. Kahit walang magbabasa ng libro ko, wapakels. Basta gusto ko mag-publish ng book. :)
Social Scale
I deal with the big wigs everyday. My usual correspondences are with CEOs, Executives, whatnots. I was in a trip together with a Vice Chairman of achuchuchu and we met up with a number of company leaders. My colleague was so impressed by them. Na-a-appreciate niyang nasa matataas na katungkulan sila at popular sila sa mga taong nakikilala namin. I don't know what's wrong with me pero I despised moments spent with them. Wala naman akong advocacy na ala-"Erap para sa mahirap" pero people like them just do not inspire me. Maybe, simply because I do not belong in the corporate world. I cringe everytime they brag about their accomplishments, their fame, their fortune. Parang gusto ko silang i-strip-an ng mga kayamanan nila at patirahin kahit isang araw lang sa squatter area. Gusto ko silang i-deprive ng masasarap na pagkain at patikimin ng instant noodles at tuyo. Gusto ko silang ibaba sa pedestal nila and shove reality to their faces. Reality sans titles, money, mansions, and f*cking beach houses.
Sabagay, hindi naman nila kasalanang matataas na tao sila sa lipunan. Pinaghirapan din naman nila makarating dun (at least yun iba). Pero it's just too depressing to see kung gano ka-extreme ang status ng mga tao. While I personally have friends na hindi man lang makabili ng bagong medyas (at nagta-tyaga sa butas-butas), eh merong mga taong gaya nila na hindi sumasakay sa eroplano unless business class. Haaay, goolai. Can't we just all be equal? (communism campaign ba ito? :p )
Faith
During my trip last week, I borrowed my brother's extra phone kasi kelangan ko ng extra phone for my Vietnam sim card. May time na nagpapaantok ako so I played around with it. I found some music videos nila sa YFC. It moved me to tears. I can't remember when was the last time I felt that much emotions towards a music video. hehe! All of a sudden, I felt a certain feeling of envy sa brother ko. Nakakaingget na at such a very young age eh may ganun na siyang ka-strong na relationship with his Lord. Na he's barely 20 at marami na siyang natulungang mga tao. At the same time, of course, sobrang nakaka-proud. I want that. I am dreaming to establish that kind of faith with my Lord and to deliver that sort of service to others who really need it. But I don't know where or how to begin. *sigh* I am as confused now as when I was starting college.
Traveller
Travelling for me is getting yourself emerged sa culture ng place na pinupuntahan mo. Experiencing their traditions, eating their food, learning to understand their language, interacting with the locals. May promise kami sa isa't isa ng brothers ko na sundin ang payo in Anthony Bourdain: "Be a traveller, not a tourist." Sadly, I failed to do that in Vietnam. Yun kasama ko always wanted to visit the malls, eat at restaurants and hang out at coffee shops. Kasi dun daw "safe". Namputsa, para lang akong nasa Maynila! I missed tk! Haaay.
Kami ng family ko kapag nagro-road trip kami, basta may mapa, ayus na. Aalis kami sa bahay ng very early Sunday morning, para around 7 or 8 nandun na kami sa destination namin. We'll attend mass sa mga lumang churches, at magbe-breakfast sa mga nearby karinderya. Tapos lilibutin ang bayan, then uuwi na. I missed those trips. Magulo na sked naming lahat eh. We couldn't spend much time together sa loob ng bahay, much less, sa labas. Laging may mga lakad. Sana soon, we'll find the time again while my parents are still young enough to enjoy it with us.
Missing
I miss him. I don't know why. I miss him all the time. I miss him while talking about him. I miss him while talking to him. I miss him. *sigh*
I missed my journal. Kinakailangan ko na atang bumalik sa pagsusulat at iwan ang online blogging. I'm keeping a journal since I was thirteen. When I was too old to ask questions and too young to know the answers. I miss the feeling of just letting the ink of your pen flow freely with your imagination, frustrations, and dreams. I miss the smell of its recycled paper. I miss the nostalgia I experience as I re-read my entiries til I fall asleep. Meron pa ko dun dried petals of roses I got from boyfriend nung hindi pa kami, at nung kami na.. :) Meron din mga marks of dried tears. Most importantly, makikita mo ang changes of emotions just by looking at my handwritings. Meron ako dung mga entries na kapag nababasa ko eh para kong nata-travel back in time. Ganun kalakas ang nostalgic effect niya. I miss Toffie. I think I must revive our good old relationship.
By the way, secret dream ko ang maging isang novelist. Kahit walang magbabasa ng libro ko, wapakels. Basta gusto ko mag-publish ng book. :)
Social Scale
I deal with the big wigs everyday. My usual correspondences are with CEOs, Executives, whatnots. I was in a trip together with a Vice Chairman of achuchuchu and we met up with a number of company leaders. My colleague was so impressed by them. Na-a-appreciate niyang nasa matataas na katungkulan sila at popular sila sa mga taong nakikilala namin. I don't know what's wrong with me pero I despised moments spent with them. Wala naman akong advocacy na ala-"Erap para sa mahirap" pero people like them just do not inspire me. Maybe, simply because I do not belong in the corporate world. I cringe everytime they brag about their accomplishments, their fame, their fortune. Parang gusto ko silang i-strip-an ng mga kayamanan nila at patirahin kahit isang araw lang sa squatter area. Gusto ko silang i-deprive ng masasarap na pagkain at patikimin ng instant noodles at tuyo. Gusto ko silang ibaba sa pedestal nila and shove reality to their faces. Reality sans titles, money, mansions, and f*cking beach houses.
Sabagay, hindi naman nila kasalanang matataas na tao sila sa lipunan. Pinaghirapan din naman nila makarating dun (at least yun iba). Pero it's just too depressing to see kung gano ka-extreme ang status ng mga tao. While I personally have friends na hindi man lang makabili ng bagong medyas (at nagta-tyaga sa butas-butas), eh merong mga taong gaya nila na hindi sumasakay sa eroplano unless business class. Haaay, goolai. Can't we just all be equal? (communism campaign ba ito? :p )
Faith
During my trip last week, I borrowed my brother's extra phone kasi kelangan ko ng extra phone for my Vietnam sim card. May time na nagpapaantok ako so I played around with it. I found some music videos nila sa YFC. It moved me to tears. I can't remember when was the last time I felt that much emotions towards a music video. hehe! All of a sudden, I felt a certain feeling of envy sa brother ko. Nakakaingget na at such a very young age eh may ganun na siyang ka-strong na relationship with his Lord. Na he's barely 20 at marami na siyang natulungang mga tao. At the same time, of course, sobrang nakaka-proud. I want that. I am dreaming to establish that kind of faith with my Lord and to deliver that sort of service to others who really need it. But I don't know where or how to begin. *sigh* I am as confused now as when I was starting college.
Traveller
Travelling for me is getting yourself emerged sa culture ng place na pinupuntahan mo. Experiencing their traditions, eating their food, learning to understand their language, interacting with the locals. May promise kami sa isa't isa ng brothers ko na sundin ang payo in Anthony Bourdain: "Be a traveller, not a tourist." Sadly, I failed to do that in Vietnam. Yun kasama ko always wanted to visit the malls, eat at restaurants and hang out at coffee shops. Kasi dun daw "safe". Namputsa, para lang akong nasa Maynila! I missed tk! Haaay.
Kami ng family ko kapag nagro-road trip kami, basta may mapa, ayus na. Aalis kami sa bahay ng very early Sunday morning, para around 7 or 8 nandun na kami sa destination namin. We'll attend mass sa mga lumang churches, at magbe-breakfast sa mga nearby karinderya. Tapos lilibutin ang bayan, then uuwi na. I missed those trips. Magulo na sked naming lahat eh. We couldn't spend much time together sa loob ng bahay, much less, sa labas. Laging may mga lakad. Sana soon, we'll find the time again while my parents are still young enough to enjoy it with us.
Missing
I miss him. I don't know why. I miss him all the time. I miss him while talking about him. I miss him while talking to him. I miss him. *sigh*
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